The Hardest Thing I’ll Ever Write

Earlier this week, my wife was killed in a car accident.  The people who read this blog on the semi-regular basis that I’ve been writing it know that we’ve been having troubles.  But, I have to say, this is the most painful ordeal I’ve ever had to go through. Whatever else was going on, I [...]

Read Full Post »

A suit of guilt

At first, putting a name to the hell I’ve been experiencing for the past few years was like euphoria.  A vindication, in a way, that my belief that it wasn’t just alcoholism that was causing all the problems.  Indeed, it may not even be alcohol causing the problems. But the more I read and the [...]

Read Full Post »

Borderline Personality Disorder

For a long time I’ve felt that my SO’s problem was a lot deeper than just alcoholism.  I knew there were some other issues that she had gone through and felt that those issues had a lot to do with this desire to drink.  I was on a web site reading about something unconnected with [...]

Read Full Post »

Downhill Slide

There have been a lot of things happening lately.  Not one of them has been good. Let’s recap the adventure a little. I had finally had enough of the drunken nights when I would get yelled at, have stuff thrown at me, be insulted, or be told how we needed to get a divorce.  I [...]

Read Full Post »

I’m still around and still alive.  But all is not well, really.  The user is still around, still trying to make me feel guilty for wanting my life back, totally incapable of running their own life.  Problems abound and a prison sentence is imminent. But I am different.  I am able to say no, I [...]

Read Full Post »

An Update

I haven’t been around for some time.  I apologize for this.  Also, thanks to everyone for their kind words and well wishes.  They mean a lot to me and this is a surprisingly difficult time to get through, believe it or not. So, let’s see what’s been happening. I have my apartment.  It’s nice.  There’s [...]

Read Full Post »

Still Busy

Hi everyone, I am moved and on my own.  Except for working on getting the other half moved into their new place, anyway. It took a total of four days of me not being there before my wife went ahead and brought a new man to stay over night.  Very nice of her.  I guess [...]

Read Full Post »

The End of All Things

I believe this may be it.  Another lie, another night out drinking. I was called by a bar, way out of the normal radius of operation, and told I had to go there to pick up my spouse.  I did. I tried to be cheerful, to show there were no hard feelings.  I was verbally [...]

Read Full Post »

I am so done with this crap.  If I’m around tomorrow I’ll post more, but I have a suspicion that I’ll be spending my day moving. I hope everyone else is doing well.

Read Full Post »

The Knotted Stomach

Everything was going fine yesterday.  Work was fine and I was doing my thing.  Then my spouse called.  After a few minutes of listening to nonsense my spouse decides that we should go out to eat. Instantly, my day crashed.  I had knots in my stomach.  I felt chilled and ill.  I was even angry [...]

Read Full Post »